i have not listened to sarah mclaughlan in so long. i am tonight. not because i am sad, i have never listened to her because i was sad. every one of her songs reminds me of something, a time, a place, a person. she is good, fucken good. i saw her at gm place. with four of my friends and one of my best friends in the bleachers. it was amazing. two and a half hours of pure bliss. i get blood taken tomorrow to finally get some answers about what's been going on with me for a year. my job is good, my life is moving forward. i fly to vancouver in the evening, i can't wait to just walk in a crowded city. my sister is coming, we are going to shop and talk.
tonight i see my friend who lives in belize. i have watched her from afar for a long time. she is truly amazing, adventurous, goofy and she can dance. i won't see her again until march. life is hard i am getting that. it would be harder if i didn't have phyillis who sat with me for a week and listened to me blubber about life, she reminded me that i am worthy. i didn't believe it then, i do now. leane who emailed me endlessly just to check in. there are so many more. everyone here knows how i feel about them.
i don't know where i will be in a year, i don't know how i will feel tomorrow but there is true excitement in just knowing that tomorrow is coming and i look forward to it.
fuck. i look forward to it. that's good.
and if you listen to hold on, 3:38 minutes in. that's the best part.
2 comments:
and i will email you endlessly to hear how good you are too! :) :)
Such an amazing life!
You are so beautiful, inside and out! I watch from afar as you touch so many people from so many places with your amazing soul, including myself. You should never question your worthiness, for if you aren't, then what leaves that for the rest of us?
At some point I will dig up that track of Sarah, but for now, it's you who are the best part for me!
alan
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